risuta Avatar
A general fiction story by

risuta

Submitted Dec 4, 2016, 11:36:33 PM

Red string

It was on our first date that he told me about the Japanese myth he always believed: that our fate were intertwined by a red string of fate, that we were destined to be together.

He said it was the red string that led me to where he was, to the place I had never imagined to be. It had always been there, tied to each other's little fingers, from the very second he and I first met.

He said it may stretch when we were apart, but no matter how far we were from each other, it would always pull us back gently to the place where we belong to.

He said that it may tangle when our hands were fumbling in the dark, trying not to lose our grip of each other, because life had caught us in a downward spiral and there was no way out.
 
But I guess he forgot that no matter how strong the string was, it would eventually break when he cut it off abruptly, leaving me hanging with words I was trying to believe in.

Comments

Don Roble Avatar

Don Roble

Commented May 26, 2016, 6:27:11 PM
Wow. This needs some spacing for this site.
Bad spelling; bad grammar. You need to edit this.
pirate60 Avatar

pirate60

Commented May 27, 2016, 10:40:11 AM
Don has it right. This needs a major overhaul in spelling, grammar and spacing for readability.
kt6550 Avatar

kt6550

Commented May 30, 2016, 8:34:20 PM
Don and Pirate hit the nail on the head.

That said, you have a great plot here. Clean this thing up and make it into a really good story.