Melisa Avatar
A general fiction story by


Submitted Feb 24, 2011, 6:28:23 PM

A Tru Tale- chapter 5

-- Page 1 of 19 --

In the last chapter(s) mum and Tru went hunting but returned with nothing. Jake was angry and ran into the forest. After Faith went after him Tru fell asleep and dreamt of her sister. She woke up and was captured by Humans. Faith on the other side of the forest was caught too but escaped with Jake's help. They both morphed and looked for Tru.

Chapter 5

"...fucking forest is huge..."

"...she okay?"

'What's...going on? Where am...I?' The thoughts took an age to form in my head.

"...Mark she's okay...fussing over her..."

"Can't help...just a kid..."

Scatters of words met my ears as my body rolled to and from the warm wall. 'I'm being carried,' I suddenly realised, recognising the thick sticks that wrapped around my body as arms.

A sickly scent stuck in my nostrils and I winced as sweat and another smell mingled. I wrinkled my nose at it and struggled to pull away. It didn't smell right, too sweet, too lingering.

My head lolled to the side and I saw dark shadows. There were tree sized ones which we passed quickly but the others walked ahead of me.

'What are they?'

"Dad?" I croaked at the indefinable figures.

"I think she just said something."

"Let me see."

The arms slacked around me, letting me roll forward. A thin face appeared before me, blue eyes gazing intently behind strands of mud brown hair. My stomach flipped over as I remembered the net and seeing him through the criss-crossing threads.

"Put her down. I need to check her over."

My body jolted as I was lowered down to the ground. He propped me up against a tree before moving away. All around me stood shadows, highlighted by the blinding beam of light. I pulled my legs up to my chest and winced as a beam glared into my eyes.

The Human who held the light squatted before me. "Hey it's okay. Don't worry."

He reached out toward me and I cried out. Pulling my arms behind me I scrabbled at the ground. "Don't!"


kt6550 Avatar


Commented Oct 12, 2015, 8:16:57 PM
A good chapter here. Ends on an upbeat note. Nice job.
pirate60 Avatar


Commented Oct 12, 2015, 9:06:06 PM
I've noticed that your dialog structure doesn't very much. For example:
“And you might want to get yourself cleaned up Xaine. You look like a ghost.” Corey said with a grin.

You may want to break it up a bit. Like this:
“And you might want to get yourself cleaned up Xaine," Corey said with a grin. "You look like a ghost.”