KwajChristine Avatar
A prose poem by

KwajChristine

Submitted Feb 12, 2010, 7:33:45 AM

7 Different Ways of Looking at the Sun

As I said in the description, I was forced to write this. I say forced, because poetry is not my thing. But since I had to write it, I thought I would share it with all of you.

7 Different Ways of Looking at the Sun

I.
Midday, exquisite donut in the sky
Illuminating, blinding, yellow
Shining upon the face
Of an annoyed passerby

II.
Beautiful, Heavenly body, full of wonder
Rising one hour, falling the next
Who can but tell
What queer action now will occur

III.
A giant ball of hot gas
Like a rather large star
Unwavering, Immovable
Planets of various girth
Surround its great entity

IV.
Late afternoon
The temperature starts to drop
Meadows of pinks and oranges
Fill the sky

V.
The leader, the take charge man
While others merely follow
He looks upon them with a watchful eye

VI.
I am one with him
And he is one with me
We go together hand in hand
I know not where we will go,
But I put my full trust in him

VII.
Ah, humanity
Why must you take me for granted?
I give you life, I give you light.
But you, you give me nothing.
You ought to look up
As if I were only seen once
Every hundred years.
Do not ignore the beauty that
Surrounds you.
For you will be gone too someday
As I fill with hostility







Comments

Don Roble Avatar

Don Roble

Commented Feb 12, 2010, 10:27:19 AM
I usualy don't say anything about poetry since I don't care for it. Yet, I read this one and was impressed. The only criticism I have is :A giant ball of hot gas
Like a rather large star

The sun is a ball of gas and is a star.
kt6550 Avatar

kt6550

Commented Feb 13, 2010, 1:22:20 AM
I hate to rate poetry.
I liked this. You did a good job for something you were forced to do.

Oh, and the sun (proper name Sol, hence Solar System) is a small star, not a large one.
Pritrostell Avatar

Pritrostell

Commented Feb 13, 2010, 1:23:48 AM
@ Don Roble

agreed, it was a nice attempt, but could have been done a bit better

@ Kwaj

It was done very well in my opinion. I myself would find it hard to get 4 verses about something like the sun... I actually had a fairly hard time with [The Virtue of Patience] which is only 4 or 5 verses.

A great job nonetheless :)