"Americans see the semi-colon as punctuation's axis of evil. Or at least some of them do."
-- Trevor Butterworth
Yog_Monster
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Yog_Monster commented on the poem titled Life by seventhson
I won't use the all-too-common words "deep" or "insightful" to describe this, just, "Apt". Good work!
Yog_Monster commented on the story titled Death Row- The Last Meal by Don Roble
Perfect use of punctuation in this story allowed it to present both the flat judgement views of Tank McQueen and allowed for a great pacing of humour too. A fine piece of work!
Yog_Monster commented on the story titled The Opera by Don Roble
I don't want to be dogmatic here but there is an error in the description: "...So good that he had to beat clients off with a stick. He" ( The lone 'He' ). Also in the fifth last paragraph is "... ...
Yog_Monster commented on the story titled Rats! by Don Roble
The opening paragraph is unsuitable for a plethora of people including some young adults; I suggest that you label this story as "Mature" for that level of graphic content.
Otherwise, an...
Otherwise, an...
Yog_Monster commented on the story titled The Crosstown Flood by Don Roble
The story was strong in content but weak in tempo. Excessive use of periods made the story elements stammer at points where it was unnecessary, giving it a short sharp rhythm in the non-action...
Yog_Monster commented on the story titled The Opera by Don Roble
Although I find this short story quite powerful in the imagery that it conjures up, it does suffer from some minor grammatical errors that act as caltrops to someone who focuses on the small things...
