"Wet Scene"

Haiku written by fabellara01 on Sunday 19, August 2007

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Description
the smell of saltiness

Overall Rating: 69.533333333333%

This writing has been rated by 3 members, resulting in a rating of 69.533333333333% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:58.333333333333%
Imagery:60.666666666667%
Spelling & Grammar:90.666666666667%
Flow/Rhythm:60.333333333333%
Vocabulary:77.666666666667%
the salty wind, the sun and the tickling sand
   

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Comments

    hmmm, i'm not sure if this just went over my head or what? i think i need a little more to sink my teeth into and chew. Looking at the title and reading the poem I can't find any connection to tell me what this is about.Sad
    the title was to think a perverted thing, but instead it's a haiku about dreaming about the beach.
    Thank you Falling-silence for enlightening me and please forgive me fabellara01 for leaving a comment which was ingnorant. I did a little research and based upon what a haiku is it looks like you did very well. Once again I beg my pardon.
    thank you for the comments.. i'll try to improve on that. Wink
    whoops, I read the title wrong, (my screen is a few feet from my face, so its ahrd to read) I took "scene" for another word.
    is the change significant?
    Alright... I Just found this. It needs work, for one its not a haiku...

    Haikus follow a specific format. There is a specific syllable count for each line. 5-7-5...

    This has 4-3-4, and doesn't follow any known formats.