Mental Illness experience

Prose written by Cos99 on Thursday 5, November 2020

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Hello users of the amateur writing website. I wish to type this experience on this website as I believe sometimes expressing mental distress on mental health websites can exacerbate the problem. I can wake up most mornings at the moment completely unsure of myself. I often have no concept of who I am, what I could do and how to be okayish in reality. An overriding feeling of confusion can take over almost instantly. The environment around me is perceived as foggy and the decisions to make are difficult. As the toast gets eaten and the cereal consumed, the mind can start to race. Numbers, times and dates often come into my head with great bewilderment. I can often think I am 100% at odds with the world and how I perceive it. Unrealistic expectations of myself and others floods my consciousness causing panic, disarray , envy and angst. "Why can't I think more like others?" Why can't I stop being trapped?" "What is about me?" As I navigate through the seconds, minutes and hours I long to stop some of the inner turmoil that dogs my being.
   

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    Oh, my. This seems quite personal. Is it? If you need some help, I would seek it.