Everyday

Poem written by onix on Friday 17, April 2020

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Description
just a (what i think is) a poem i thought off

Overall Rating: 98.8%

This writing has been rated by 1 members, resulting in a rating of 98.8% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:99%
Imagery:97%
Spelling & Grammar:100%
Flow/Rhythm:99%
Vocabulary:99%
I wait patiently, everyday. I stay up late at night, no answer. I hold in the anger,the rage, the hate. I speak but no one listens. I laugh but no one understands. I look upon the view, people walk on by. I stand upon the view, suddenly they care.
   

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Comments

    That was so perfect! Simple, rhythmic, a terrific contrasting of the two sides of human nature. Something everyone can easily relate to. I like the way it starts with the passive--wait, stay up, hold in--building the pressure. Then it breaks forth to the active--speak, laugh, look. Then the trespass occurs and finally a reaction. Who hasn't had the same aggravating sense of being unfairly ignored only to be faulted for interrupting.
    I love this too. The last line is especially impactful and perfectly sums up the message you're sending, as well as your word choice capturing the emotions being felt. Well written.
    Kind of fun. Nice job. Cool