Some days...

Essay written by NvanGraan on Thursday 31, January 2019

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Some days the sun shines, but some days darkness creeps in...

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Some days I wake up and I want to jump for joy. I smell the flowers and gape at the gorgeous landscapes before me. I feel refreshed and positive and motivated to tackle life with both hands. Other days is exactly the opposite. I open my eyes feeling drained and exhausted. I look around and all I see is my flaws: dishes not done, clothes lying around, school prep not done. I put my feet on the floor but they feel like lead. Refusing to move, and making me stumble. Smiling hurts and my eyes look dull and empty. I go through the day wishing something excited will happen that will turn my mood around. But on days like these, everything that happens turns out negative and dark. Making me drown in the sea of dark and depressed emotions that seems to be everywhere around me. I tell myself how bad I am at stuff and how I should be so much more. Setting the bar so high that it gloom like an Everest in front of my eyes, making me just give up swimming and allowing the darkness to envelop me. Lost, dark, and ...... free! You see, sometimes the dark isn’t a bad thing. It makes you see the things the optimist in you missed. Somewhere deep inside fueling the fire to get up and be different, better. It gives you the opportunity to take a break from the pressure you and society puts you through. 24 hours to be a perfectly broken being. One that feels pain, sadness and regret. One that gives an out for all the pieces the light can’t shine on. Some days, it’s ok not to be ok. Some days you can be dark and depressed and down. You can take a break and slowly gather the guts to get up and be all bright and sunny again ... even the weather does things this way... Darkness is good ... some days The End

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    Welcome to the Den, Nvan. Basically well written in what I presume is not your first language.
    Note that I write and comment based on S.E. (Simplified English: Routh's term for the US and, strangely, Israeli bastardized version of our almost common language) and I am unfamiliar with some peculiarities and aberrations of P.E. (Primitive English, my label for the UK/CAN/AUS version). If I indicate as an error or less desirable choice in wording or punctuation that which is actually correct or preferred in P.E., then I stand corrected and you should ignore that comment unless you intend significant S.E. readership.

    Other days is exactly the opposite. {either "days are" or "it is"}
    and all I see is my flaws: {"all" can be singular or plural: here plural so "are" }
    Refusing to move, and making me stumble. {incomplete sentence}
    something excited will happen that {"exciting" you -- "excited" means it is excited}
    that it gloom like an Everest {unsure of meaning: "gloom" is noun; maybe "looms" ? }
    Lost, dark, and ...... free! {what's with the dots lately? only 1, 3, or 4 sequential OK: 1 = period, 3 = ellipsis, 4 = ellipsis followed by period}
    Somewhere deep inside fueling the fire... {not a sentence as written; maybe "darkness fuels" }
    pain, sadness[,] and regret. {many editors, and I, prefer the "Oxford comma" }
    broken being. One that {"being, one that" otherwise 2nd part isn't a sentence}
    Somewhere deep inside fueling ... different, better. {incomplete sentence as written}
    some days[.]

    An insightful view insightfully expressed. [Maybe "insightfully" isn't yet a word, but it should be.] There are a lot of items noted but all are minor and mainly concern the idiosyncrasies of English.
    Good writing; with a little editing, excellent writing. Write on.
    Welcome to the human race! Nice job capturing a bad case of the blues.