Poem written by Sydney Malkauskas on Tuesday 4, September 2018

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Derealization// depersonalization

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Today I anticipate a dark time today i crawl under dark clouds today lay myself open and vulnerable to be attacked this morning i envisioned the best day laughs and embrace full of warmth and perfect notes to last a lifetime as time passes i encounter your darkness again old friend you come from spaces unknown engulf me from behind and only let me out every so often you release me in the morning with a tough heart i can feel in my throat and i can still feel it for weeks to come again you let me out but only for a few days i don't hear it when you knock but there you are making me choke on my own breath making me never want that feeling again panic anxiety remorse headache heartache thoughts can this be over yet silence peacefulness i'm tired tired of letting you appear in my life but how will i stop you? did i make you?

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    This comes across to me as some very abstract free verse. The ending (the last few lines) tend to lead to a change in direction; i. e., from dark to light. But it is a very small portion of the poem. Perhaps you need to make it longer if you are going to move into something brighter or drop back down into the dark side.