Grandma's Lullabies

Poem written by Lonelyhearts1224 on Monday 6, August 2018

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The world's purest form of love that's known

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I sing to thee, sweet lullabies; melodious tunes that come to mind. Exquisite fruit of tender taste.... my arms, they long for your embrace. Sweet child of love and simplicity, consume my thoughts, exigencies. For you were sent to ease grief's craze; The more to cheer my golden age. Transgressed the torment that pierced my heart; Infused my space with your vivacious laugh. Angelic life force, God's subsidy, has helped me numb life's tragedies. Your mischievous deeds and playful ways, Keep me on my toes day after day. The purest, selfless love on earth is known... That of a grandma and and her grandchild surmounts them all. written on: May 21, 2018

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    Such a heartwarming poem! Well done!

    Without being an expert in poetry I think you need to work on the structure of your poem. For example:
    "Transgressed the torment that pierced my heart
    Engulfed my world with your vivacious laugh
    Angelic life force, God's subsidy
    has helped me numb life's tragedies"

    Also, a few spelling mistakes:
    Esquisite - exquisite
    you're embrace - your embrace
    Keeps me on my toes - keep me on my toes
    Very uneven, Lonely. Great concept, mediocre execution.
    'exigencies' ? It's tempting to use all your vocabulary (else why have it?) but make sure it fits.
    Very beautiful. And very true.