This load of utter s*it contains profanity (that's swear words) and probably a load of other stuff that shouldn't be on here. Unfortunately I can't remember most of it so I'll give it an age classification of 44. Though,if you're 16 or over you probably won't suffer any lasting damage.
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Anyway, moving swiftly on.
One might think that stepping out on court might actually ease Andy’s pain. I mean, blimey, the heaviest items in his pockets during a match are tennis balls. Then again, I’ve experienced the agony of tennis elbow, so perhaps not.
But, aside from the hip-wrecking millions earned from Andy’s outstanding achievements, do you reckon it was all worth it?
“Too fcuking right, it was!” I hear you cry, ‘He’s MINTED!’
But, so what, I say? It’s just money. Most of it only exists electronically anyway. It doesn’t bring you happiness. Wealth only widens the gap between the haves and the have-nots.
So that’s why Andy’s Scottish pal, President Trump, very kindly offered to hold Andy’s money for him until he hangs up his balls, so to speak. The theory behind the offer being that if Andy doesn’t ‘have it on his hips,’ then, perhaps, they might get better, thereby eking out a few more championships, like Roger Federer.
Sound logic. Which begs the question: was it really President trump who made the offer?
Apparently the ‘president’s man’ who approached Andy with the proposition had a Russian accent and a briefcase with a needle sticking out of it.
‘He’s probably diabetic.’ Andy most likely thought, ‘Anyway, America is even more multi-cultural than the UK. Why shouldn’t ‘old Trumpy’ employ Russians? It’s not like he’d form an alliance with them and misappropriate my millions to….oh I don’t know, lets say, build a wall to keep the Mexicans out of America, or something. That would be stupid. It didn’t work for the Romans. It didn’t even succeed in East Germany and that one was huge. That one in Chinas lasted a while mind, but even that’s crumbling in places.
Walls are shite!’
Agreed, Andy. But until you’ve willed the taste of Raspberry out of one of their frozen, pork sausages, you’ve no idea, pal.
Till next time, Denizens.