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Rap written by Ruben4133 on Tuesday 25, July %11

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Something I wrote about an ex. This was only finished a few months ago but I've essentially been working on it for a few years. Let me know what you think.

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You are beautiful in every single way every move you take and every sound you make brings me to my knees especially when I can't breathe I sit and think about the things you mean to me you are the world that I can't conceive like how a guy believes how god cannot bleed listenin to you talk watching as you walk I can't help but feel that spark that one we got at the park when we went for a walk and I was looking to talk I felt that connection don't tell me you missed it to me love is a mission one that I want to finish as soon as I can cause I don't understand these feelings I have it might be because I'm a man don't show tears don't show weakness never let anyone off for that weak shit stayed strong for so long that's all I know that's how my fam taught me to grow so now I have a family name to uphold I'm standin all alone but they're all home as if nothing was going wrong and at the end of this song I'll take a rip from the bong to calm down right now and listen to this crowd roar real loud and tell me something that I really didn't know about about things I'm missing in life and that makes me turn and realize I need to correct thoughts in my mind but back to who back to you the one that I choose to hold it down when i move to hold it down when I act a fool I wish you were around more so I can do the things you asked for like show you attention and to ask you about things you mention I miss those little pointless conversations especially the ones that end up havin me say shit it's gay as shit but here I am and I just had to say it I miss the crawl of your skin when we sat in the sun on the pavement those days were like paintins it's like someone finally realized what Picasso was sayin as he was paintin putting every amount of pain in into his beautiful creation
   

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  • That was a bit of an outpouring, wasn't it?

    But I get it, Ruben.

    There were some grammar & spelling errors in there (especially lower case i's in reference to yourself). But hey, it was an outburst, at least that's the way it came across to me; a real outpouring and it was RAW, which kept me reading.

    Favourite line: I'm standin all alone but they're all home
    as if nothing was going wrong and at the end of this song I'll take a rip from the bong to calm down


    Nice work.
    - September 10 2017 19:19:15
    • The problem I have with evaluating rap is that you need to have the rhythmn track to go along with it. Kind of tough to do that here. Cool

      That said, good job. Nicely written.
      - September 12 2017 00:27:32