Snow White: The Evil Queen (Part 5)

Story written by Blood_Black_Rose on Sunday 14, February %11

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A Twist on an old tale. How I think it should have been written.

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Part 5 It didn't take the prince long to find Snow White. As he entered the small hut of a house, he could smell freshly made tea. And sure enough, there sat his fair lady sipping from a tea cup, with a body split in two beside her. "How did you find me?" Asked Snow White. "All the animals have returned from hiding, my fair lady, so I figured there was no one left in the forest to disturb them." Said the prince as he bowed. The princess nodded slowly. Now was the time to end the contest and find out who won. "How many mini men did you kill?" Snow White asked. "Three and you my lady?" replied the prince. "Four, which makes me the winner and home I shall now go, good day." With that said Snow White dropped her tea cup on the floor and left. Snow White returned to the castle, changed, slept and ate. By the following morning, she felt wonderful, until her father called for her. Snow White's father had been bedridden since the night after his wedding to the new queen by an unknown illness. Snow White tapped on her father's door and was beckoned inside. Snow White sat in the chair next to her father's bed and waited for him to speak. "My darling daughter, I fear it won't be long now before I die." Snow White's father gasped out the words. The princess smiled, "No father, it won't be long now. But before you die, I must tell you something." "What is it, my child?" Spluttered the king. It took all Snow White's effort not to get up and dance a jig as she spoke. "It was I whom killed mother! She was out on the balcony, and I just pushed her over and she went splat on the ground below." "Why?" asked the king. "Just because I could and as for you, father, it is I who is killing you. Since it's too late to stop now, I shall tell you how." Laughed Snow White. "The apple you have every single morning with your tea, it's poisoned." The king gasped and suddenly turned blue, then grey and then he was gone. The princess stood, spat upon her dead father and left his room, not telling anyone that the king was dead. The prince was so in love with his fair lady, he risked his neck going to her castle. Once there he was summoned inside, where he found his beloved sitting on her father's throne. "Prince, why have you returned?" Asked Snow White. Getting down on one knee the prince looked into the princess's eyes, "I have befallen under your spell, my fair lady. I shall do anything you say just as long as I can remain by your side." Promised the prince. The princess was overwhelmed and something in her chest warmed slightly. "My prince, you will remain by my side and be king, but if you stray or do anything I don"t care for, I shall behead you without hesitation." Replied the Princess sweetly. The prince nodded and stood, taking Snow Whites hand and giving it a kiss. "My life is yours, forever, My Lady." Snow White left the prince in the throne room and went in search of her stepmother. She found her once again in her room in front of her mirror. "Stepmother, I am here to tell you, father is dead, I killed him." The princess said with a grin. The queen looked at Snow White and held out her arms, "You are my daughter, not only by name but by soul as well, and YOU will make a better queen than I." Said the queen with a tear in her eye. Snow White pulled out the dagger she had taken from the heart of the Huntsman, which still lay in its box in the throne room, from her sleeve and plunged it into the back of the queen. Then said, "Yes, mother I couldn't agree more." The queen started to spit up blood and slipped to the floor as the blood from her back pooled around her. Queen Snow White just watched with a smile on her lips. The End.

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  • Okay, you found a good story line. You have it broken up too much. You need to fill the parts out more.
    - February 17 2016 16:23:16
    • You also need to edit.

      A nice, dark turn on the traditional Snow White tale.
      - February 21 2016 19:30:29
      • i had it viewed by a publisher, he edited what needed to be done. guess i'll never be perfect. Smile oh well, i'll just tell my tales and if people want to listen (read) thats completely up to them. as always thanks for the comments. BBR out!
        - March 06 2016 10:15:18