The Valley

Poem written by pirate60 on Monday 26, January 2015

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Description
rhyme

Overall Rating: 95.2%

This writing has been rated by 1 members, resulting in a rating of 95.2% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:90%
Imagery:95%
Spelling & Grammar:95%
Flow/Rhythm:100%
Vocabulary:96%
The Valley Down in the valley where the grass grows tall, And the trees are filled with the Robin's call. I walk upon its rivers shore, To open my soul to the beauty before. I feel the wind, with its gentle kiss, Breath deeply the air; A lovers mistress. I see the rainbow of the butterfly's wings. Its choir of colors, encircling kings. Of mind and heart, of men and beast, On mothers breasts a soul can feast. I am but one, and that's fine with me. For the one shares the air, the water and valley.
   

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Comments

    It seems like this weekend's trip to the lake was good for you, pirate. Wink

    Very nice!
    Beautiful imagery Pirate. The last line seems a bit awkward in its rhythm, otherwise I enjoyed reading this very much.
    Agreed. I may want to divide this last line into three creating a pause effect ending with the rhyme words Me/valley. What do you think?
    Lovely.