You are the hiccups

Poem written by flickeringfairy on Tuesday 5, April 2011

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Description
The ups and downs of the hiccups and other nuisances, but mostly the downs.

Overall Rating: 91.2%

This writing has been rated by 2 members, resulting in a rating of 91.2% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:91%
Imagery:92%
Spelling & Grammar:91.5%
Flow/Rhythm:91%
Vocabulary:90.5%
You are the hiccups, let me explain. You make quite a racket, you cause me some pain. After a while, of you, I would rid Myself and I can. How much would you bid? At the worst times of day, you make yourself heard. Whether loud or soft, you're a repetitive bird. At times you are funny, A welcome reprieve. But most other times, I wish you'd just leave. The sooner the better, More often than not, You just stick around no matter how much I've fought. Please go away And take the memories too. I want them as much As I want the flu.
   

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Comments

    Excellent; awonderful verse.

    I loved this.
    Very nice, and very true. Good job.
    Another nice contribution. Minor glitches, such as a period mark missing on last line of third paragraph or stanza.

    Last line on the fourth one is a bit too long, could be simpler for better flow when reading.

    Four stars plus, out of five.