For the Love of Froot Loops Part 4
DescriptionThings are getting a bit heavy for Chuck and the fates give their prophesy to Hades
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Hades If you thought that finding the Fates was easy, you would be dead wrong (pun intended, sometimes I really kill myself. Ha!). You would have an easier time finding a category 6 hurricane on a planet with no atmosphere. It wasn't like I could just make a phone call to get them here, they had to be summoned; and only if they weren't busy ending some mortals life short by some horrible disaster would they answer. So, I did the ritual and hoped for the best. On the third day they appeared in my living room as I was enjoying that day's obituary. I always like to keep a good idea who was added to my pool of souls; just in case there is a particularly nasty being that I can assign an even nastier eternity. What can I say; I need something to help pass the time down here. "You called for us," Lachesis asked, knowledge in her perfect voice. I looked up from my paper and admired them for a moment. I may have a wife, but let's face it; Persephone is a bitch. Sure I may have tricked her into being my wife, but what was past is past. She really needed to get over that minor detail of our relationship. But the Fates; they were something completely different. How awesome would it be it have not one or two ladies on my arm...but three? That is every man's dream, mortal or otherwise. Disregard every story you have ever heard of the Fates, every description ever told. They were not old, ancient woman; well, at least not anymore. Just like the rest of the Gods they changed their appearance according to what age it was and what style fit them the best. Like me they chose the Goth style of clothing, which was very flattering to their exceptionally pale skin. Clotho, the youngest of the three sisters, had long straight black hair with amber eyes that stood out against her pale, almost translucent, skin. Lachesis was the middle child, she also had black hair but instead of wearing it long like her sister she chose to wear it no longer than to her chin, and it was so curly it looked like she wore a poodle as her hair and eyes as clear as a cloudless sky. Finally there was Atropos, the oldest. She was the most...inflexible of the three, hence her name I suppose. She too had the black hair but instead of letting it hang down like the others, she chose to have it pulled back in a tight bun, and yes, she did wear glasses with eyes as dark as a raging storm over the ocean. All I needed was to imagine her in a business suit and I had the perfect fantasy to last me for weeks. One time, while Persephone was in a particularly friendly mood, and we were getting it on; I accidently called out Atropos' name. You ever hear the phrase 'Hell has no fury like a woman scorned'? Well, you never want to see what the queen of the underworld pissed, it's not pretty. And she still holds this grudge against me to this day. It's been years since I have been able to enjoy my wife. I'm a man, I have needs! Anyway, there the three of them stood Lachesis and Atropos in the same black tank top, baggy black bondage pants and Vans skater shoes. Clotho decided to go with a more 'school girl' look. She was wearing a black short sleeve button-up shirt with a black and red tie around her neck and a black thigh high pleated skirt accompanied by fishnet stockings and 2 inch heels. See why I love these ladies? "Yes, I need some information on a -" "Chuck Norris. He has been giving you a bit of trouble I see..." Lachesis interrupted in a dreamy voice, "And you need us to tell you what his weakness is." "Correct," I confirmed, even though I knew there was no need. The Fates see everything, know everything. Not even the Gods know how a human is going to die; (unless we are the ones that are doing the killing, and even then the Fates knew it was going to happen) except for the Fates. "Absolutely not, this is your fight to win Hades. We cannot reveal how event will unfold, or how to change their course," Atropos said. See, what did I tell you? Pain in the ass, but oh so sexy. "Ladies, ladies, ladies," I said with a light chuckle, "I am working on a plan to" "We know," they said in unison. "I know you know. But I am so close to actually taking Olym" "We know," they said as one again. "I know!" Fire flared in the fireplace when I yelled. I was starting to lose my temper with them interrupting me. How was I supposed to gloat that after all these years a plan of mine is actually working when they won't let me get 5 words in? "Heh. Sorry. All I need to know is if this Chuck person is going to get in my way or not?" An eerie chill entered the room and I knew that they were doing as I 'requested'. Let's face it, I wasn't going to let them leave here till I got what I wanted. "He was a world stranger, Until he became the Texas Ranger. Beware his feet and hands because a chance you will not stand. However, he has a superior flaw That will ultimately be his fall. Crush the ego and you will crush the man. A word of caution to the tale If he should survive all you give him Your plan shall fail." As they finished their prophesy they vanished before I got to ask one question. What did they mean that I could fail? I was a God! How could one little human stand in my way? However, if I can destroy his ego, perhaps he would not be such a threat. That's if the fates were right, and let's face it; they were never wrong. But now that I got to the Fates, time to see what the Furies could do for me. Being the servants of Hell, I was willing to bet they had a trick or two up their collective sleeve.