Father

Poem written by Raven on Monday 18, February %3

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Overall Rating: 70.2%

This writing has been rated by 3 members, resulting in a rating of 70.2% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:71.333333333333%
Imagery:61.666666666667%
Spelling & Grammar:83.333333333333%
Flow/Rhythm:64.666666666667%
Vocabulary:70%
You were my father once Until she took you away from me I understand you need a wife But I'm your daughter and I need a father I rarely get to see you and When I do it's like I'm not even there I feel like I've lost my father And it's all because of her She took my father away And it's like she doesn't even care You are still in my head Even though you're never there When I need a father You'd rather be with her But when you need a daughter I am always there
   

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6 comments

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  • Routh
    A good poem, althought the flow doesn't really match up. The lines are kind of random in rhythm and length.
    - February 17 2009 17:00:47
    • kt6550
      A nice bit of free verse.
      - April 28 2009 02:48:32
      • Greg
        This reads like a letter. Sometimes when i read something like a letter, its hard to relate and find empathy.
        It's simple and bittersweet though.
        Thanks for sharing.
        - November 16 2017 02:47:14
        • NannyanziM256
          the poem is too plain, the descriptions don't really stir interest in the reader's mind
          - December 05 2017 13:16:52
          • Lil
            I like it. Written with feeling.
            - March 25 2020 21:42:53
            • David Vanni
              Nice poem, flows well but some of the rhymes don't quite sync up.
              - December 29 2020 10:18:30