Love Intertwined

Romance Story written by cruzer323 on Sunday 22, November %1

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Description
My first time at this kind of writing...

Overall Rating: 87.733333333333%

This writing has been rated by 3 members, resulting in a rating of 87.733333333333% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:89%
Imagery:88.666666666667%
Spelling & Grammar:87%
Flow/Rhythm:87%
Vocabulary:87%
Sitting on that park bench, I wasn't sure how I felt. I was feeling guilty for what I was about to do, I felt upset about what I thought would happen, but nonetheless I was determined to see it to the end. The day was mildly warm "" spring and summer were intertwining, the days were getting warmer, and the fauna was in full bloom. There was a slight breeze that felt cool on my skin, yet warm on my clothes. As I saw somebody walking along the path I slowly turned my head to see who it was. My heart sank when I was it wasn't him. Relax, I told myself, he will be here, he's not one to go against his word. After another minute or two of waiting, I saw him walk slowly down the path, looking around, trying to find me. "James!" I called out, "Over here!" He looked in my direction, shielding his eyes from the harsh sun with his left hand. When he saw me he started walking in my direction, slightly faster than before. As he came over and sat down, my heart skipped a beat. This was the man I loved. This was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Although I was only fifteen, it was my first experience of love, and I knew it was to be. "I got your message," he said casually, looking in another direction, avoiding eye contact, "what did you need to talk about?" My heart sank, and my shoulders slumped. I knew how he was feeling "" he was feeling uncomfortable around me, as he usually did. Whatever nerve I had, I had just lost it. "I-I'm sorry..." I stuttered nervously, fighting back tears, "I didn't m-mean to waste your time... I'll l-leave..." As I got up to walk away, James grabbed my wrist gently, sending a jolt straight to my heart. His skin was warm and soothing, and made my heart beat slower. "Look at me." he said. I did so, turning to face him. I saw his blue eyes, his beautiful blue eyes, and I just broke down, collapsing back on the seat and beginning to sob uncontrollably. James flinched for a moment, as if the sight was unpleasant, but then moved in closer to me to comfort me. "Hey... Don't cry..." he said soothingly, which only made me sob harder. "I'm so s-sorry..." I sobbed, "I h-hate crying in front of p-people. I'm so weak..." James looked at me sternly, before saying "You are not weak. You're human, just like the rest of us. Never let anyone make you feel useless, like you don't belong. You're better than that." I wiped the tears that were running down my face, then looked up at James again. He was smiling warmly at me again, which made me feel good inside. I smiled back at him, then without thinking gave him the biggest hug I'd ever given, sobbing quietly onto his shoulder, pressing my head softly against his neck. James was shocked. I expected him to push me off of him, to get angry at me and storm off, but he didn't. Instead he wrapped his arms around me, and started gently stroking his fingers through my hair, trying to comfort me. It slowed my breathing, and I stopped crying. I couldn't believe what was happening; it was not going according to plan. It was going much better than expected. I figured it was now or never. "James..." I began slowly, "I asked you to come here so I could tell you in person... I love you, so much. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else before. I'm sorry... I can't help it..." James' reaction shocked me. I had expected him to hit me, insult me, abuse me. But instead, he did something totally unexpected. He kissed my neck, so gently that I wasn't sure if I had imagined it or not, then whispered into my ear, "It's okay. Because I love you too. I've loved you ever since I found out, ever since you started feeling the same way towards me. I've been trying to hide it, so badly; I didn't want you to get hurt. I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner..." I broke apart from him, and stared into his eyes again. "But... What about Cody? Does she know?" James sighed deeply, averting his gaze for a moment. "I feel really bad about that. I did like her, for a short time, but after that I just used her to try and push you away from me." "Well... It only made me want you more..." James smiled at me. "I can see that." I laughed. It had been more than a month since I had last laughed, and I had missed it. James embraced me in another hug, and I gently ran my fingers through his mid-length, brown and blonde hair. "I love you, James." "And I love you, John."
   

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6 comments

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  • Pretty good, nicely composed.

    Well done.
    - November 22 2009 06:05:46
    • Very nicely done. It could use a bit of formatting.
      - November 23 2009 01:56:55
      • aw c'mon! gays!:O. lmfao.
        that was a good 1
        - November 23 2009 18:52:58
        • Ah, formatting, my worst enemy. I was never taught proper formatting for writing until halfway through year 9... Which was a few months ago... I usually forget to use it, though...
          And BVH, what's wrong with that?
          - November 24 2009 08:10:33
          • nah! it's fine! that's actually the twist in the tale!
            it was just unexpected
            - November 27 2009 16:04:32
            • Yeah, that was my plan for the plot twist =p.
              I might write some more stuff like this, if I get lovesick again >.<
              - November 30 2009 08:31:20