A New Paradise

Poem written by Natasha on Monday 18, February 2002

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Overall Rating: 78.1%

This writing has been rated by 2 members, resulting in a rating of 78.1% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:78.5%
Imagery:81.5%
Spelling & Grammar:82%
Flow/Rhythm:67.5%
Vocabulary:81%
As a breeze comforts my cheek, I awaken and open my eyes. I see but stains of frustration and defeat, As a dusky shadow attacks the colourless skies. An atmosphere of endless silence and fantasy, Come about as unimaginable visions. They control all thoughts of pain and sympathy, Taking over your mind and decisions. An agonizing flame covers the water, As hot steam rises to melt the darkness. Your worries are blazed over by the golden fire, As hurt and damage is endured by the overcoming of obscureness. Death quickly lifts itself, As clouds of relief casually surround each bound. I see quick flashes of my past life as well as my troubled health, For I am not only lost, but will never be found. Life, a treasure I once had, But was given to me without warning, time limit nor clue. So I shall cry forevermore, and stay sad, For I was too young to be forgotten, My time was not yet due.
   

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