Blue Stars

Story written by MadeNew on Thursday 20, November 2008

Member Avatar
Description
Dreams are far more beautiful than reality sometimes...

Overall Rating: 97.4%

This writing has been rated by 2 members, resulting in a rating of 97.4% overall. Below is a breakdown of these results:

Concept/Plot:97.5%
Imagery:99.5%
Spelling & Grammar:100%
Flow/Rhythm:95%
Vocabulary:95%
Last night, I dreamed the stars were blue. They were set into golden ribbon laced with dipping loops of black. If I reached up, I could swirl them around in my hand. The meadow was bursting with pinks and oranges and yellows and reds. You could get lost forever and always find your way out, because there was nothing but this. Glorious beauty. A waterfall trickled down from the sky, flowing with an endless amount of those beautiful blue stars. Its silky clear strands bubbled, whispering names of those I loved and singing sweet memories to the air. Even if you hadn't been there, I wouldn't have been alone. But you were there, and you were the most beautiful thing in the entire heavenly garden. I turned, saw your eyes, and suddenly, the stars were dulled. I didn't care if I never saw the flowers again, so long as I could see you forever. And miraculously, you took me into your arms, and I was in the most wonderful place I'd ever been, the only place I'd ever want to be. You said my name, and the waterfall was shamed by the music of your voice. I cried sweetened tears of silver joy, and you reached up to pluck a blue star from the magnificent skies. You laid it softly in my hands, and it glowed for us alone, an everlasting symbol of some ancient, newborn thing. The colors faded then, all the gorgeous flowers, and I couldn't hear the sweet music of the water anymore. It didn't matter, as long as you were there. But then you weren't, and I woke up to silver stars and black skies too far away to reach. My tears were salty, this time. Oh, if only the stars were blue.
   

Post Comment

Please Login to Post a Comment.

Comments

    It was too nice for me to feel sad at the end. I myself am not a good writer (you can read my stuff and rate it extremely low). Since I'm not a good writer, I can't tell you what to improve on. Just go on what you think.